Thursday, January 31, 2008

The Deli

As you're wandering through the grocery store you might come across the deli. Now let me take a moment to say that I love the deli. Because it's always attached to the bakery. It's every man's dream, isn't it? We've got the meat, the cheese, and the bread all in one location. All I need is a TV with a football game on and a recliner and I'll be good to go. Now the problem with the deli is the pressure that gets put on you by the people behind the counter. I always try to wait until they are helping someone else so I can slide and look at the deals at my own pace. God help you if you're the only one there. There's just too many choices. Do I want Honey Ham or Maple Ham? Oven Baked Turkey or Smoked Turkey? Then there's all the meats that aren't sliced. Huge chunks of animals I've never even heard of. I'm still searching for that magical salami creature. The worst part is when there's something you want but the pre-cut version is too thin or too thick. Then you've got to ask them to cut you some fresh. You can hear the disdain in their voice from the moment you ask. I try to make it a point not to piss off people who work around lots of knives and slicers.


Space Monsters from OHIO said...

Yea, as an ex-deli worker I hated it most when people would come up and ask for freshly sliced meat...I would hope they turned around and when they did bam...they got the shit from the case. Did I worry no...I'd just say ohhh I thought you said that it looked fresh...Yea but deli people are fun to piss off sometimes...because you can watch them so they cant spit in your food or do other ungodly weird shit to it.

If you havent watched wild hogz I demand you see it. Tim allen says in one quote I'm a man I love meat! and potatos and gravy! then he begins to drink from the gravy boat...

I personally love meat and hate potatos...Though i do enjoy a good hashbrown or even tater tots...Mmm mmm Bitch

Dave said...

Haha man I'm with you. I used to despise those people who wanted their meat cut paper thin and stuff. Even though now, I'd still like to have mine that way (it just tastes better) but I won't make them do it.

You fool! Meat + Potatoes = Manliest man around. Even hobbits know about the deliciousness that is potatoes. PO-TA-TOES!